I am the classic older child of the parable of The Prodigal son.

Here is my paraphrasing of the parable:

This man had two sons. The older son who was obedient to his dad and took care of family. Younger son asked for his inheritance and once he received it, he left his parents’ house and wasted it away with waywardly lifestyle. Once his money was gone and his friends left him, he realized what an idiot he was. He made his way back to his parents’ house to be a servant and live on pay check. His hope was that at least he will not be hungry. As he got to the gate of his parents’ house, his dad saw him, ran towards him and embraced the son.

Dad decided to have a big party to celebrate the return of his long lost son. While the party was going on, the older son was returning from the field. Older son was surprised at all the commotion and someone told him that his dad is throwing a party because the long lost son returned. Older son got very mad because he has been working very hard, living according to his dad’s wish and he never asked to have even a small get together with his friends. Now that his younger brother is back, dad is having a big party? Does dad not care about all the hard work of his older son? All these years while the younger one was partying and being promiscuous, the older one was working on the farm and leading a sensible and respectable life. How is it fair that the younger one just swoop in?

Jesus told this parable to explain how we were lost like the prodigal son and how we came back to our loving Heavenly Father. I was saved by grace when I was a child. My testimony does not involve history of drug use, promiscuity, parties or other things some Christians have if they got saved in their adulthood. My testimony does not have the frills and it will not be a movie because it is not glamorous. When I was in college, I got very mad at God about these people who sleep around, have drinking parties, snort things and all will be forgiven if they believe and confess that Jesus is Lord. How is that fair? I was quite furious at this unfair situation. Then God who loves me SO MUCH lead my heart to read the parable of two sons. I rolled my eyes at Holy Spirit because i know that the father forgives the younger son. Hello! I have read this passage several times before and prayed for the prodigals to return home. I started reading the passage begrudgingly and my eyes welled up as I read the older son’s response to his father’s joy. To this day, i occasionally get jealous of the prodigal children who come back home and I have remind myself that God loves me too.

In addition, because God stealing my heart at a very young age, He saved me a lot of pain that prodigals have to go through and continue to process for the rest of their lives. Whenever jealousy stirs up in heart, it ends with gratitude toward God for protecting me from the pain and suffering.